At every age children are both trying to gain their own independence, and will at the same time, be somewhat to even greatly afraid of the separation such independence presents. It is important for parents and guardians to encourage the transitions to greater independence, gradually but genuinely, as the children grow. Your role is one of easing fear, showing what is possible and providing a sense of security that, no matter what your children try, you’re right there alongside them. let’s build children independence and confidence by this way!
Teach your children that it is okay to be separate. Help your children to see that it’s both acceptable and occasionally desirable to sometimes be alone, to peacefully disagree with another’s opinion, or to want personal time.
Search for opportunities to show examples of your own individual small accomplishments. An example could be something as simple as struggling to open a jar, but not giving up, and striving to get it open without any help. Draw attention to the experience by saying such words as: “Look, mommy tried really hard, didn’t give up and I did it!” Your children will then see that you try to accomplish things alone––and very often succeed.
Observe your children at play and in everyday life. Pay close attention to their likes and dislikes. Look for opportunities to talk with them about what they are doing or playing with. Spot the ways that they can improve their play by simple changes that they can make themselves. These changes can be as easy as adding a book for a toy car ramp or where to place their feet as they learn how to pedal their bikes.
Request your child’s input and advice on small tasks. Your child will learn that his or her opinion is important to you. Following through with his or her suggestions helps the child’s healthy internally nourished self-esteem to grow (rather than the ineffective externally imposed boosterism). It is then your job to encourage your child’s suggestions and to make him or her a very valuable asset to the task at hand.
Include your children in everyday household chores that involve their own stuff.It is much easier for children and for that matter, anyone to identify and want to help with things that they care about and are familiar with. Even if it sometimes means that you may have to go back and “really clean” the areas that you have asked them to be in charge of, passing on the expectations of responsibility for one’s own things is worth the extra effort.